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Showing posts from October, 2017


"You are a basically healthy person, you are not condemned, and you are not a sinner. You are already a healthy person, fundamentally. Despite the projections that might be cast on you, despite the shadow that may be cast on you, the point is to see though the shadow and just do it and just live it. That is intuition." - Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche

This (extra)ordinary life.

“Do not ask your children to strive for extraordinary lives. Such striving seems admirable, but it is the way of foolishness. Help them instead to find the wonder and the marvel of an ordinary life. Show them the joy of tasting tomatoes, apples, and pears. Show them how to cry when pets and people die. Show them the infinite pleasure in the touch of a hand. And make the ordinary come alive for them. The extraordinary will take care of itself” - William Martin

My mom shared this passage with my sister and me a few days ago. Later that morning, she posted it on Facebook, saying that she hopes she can internalize this kind of appreciation for the magic of ordinary life.

I replied: “Mom, you do. You bring so much magic to the simplest things - summer mornings on the back deck, fresh berries and a hot pot of coffee, sun and wind in the trees. Your ability to create beauty in the home makes the simplest moments full of magic.”

It’s true. My mother can bring beauty and magic into just ab…

On wisdom, love & despair

“The problem is that the desire to change is fundamentally a form of aggression toward yourself. The other problem is that our hang-ups, unfortunately or fortunately, contain our wealth. Our neurosis and our wisdom are made out of the same material. If you throw out your neurosis, you also throw out your wisdom." - Pema Chodron, from "Awakening Loving Kindness"
“Right down there in the thick of things, we discover the love that will never die.” - Pema Chodron, on moving through human connection, with all its attendant turbulence and doubt, to awaken from fear into true love.

A Year

A letter, honoring a year of healing and growth. 


There are so many things I want to say to you on this new day of this new year. So much has happened in this one trip around the sun. It feels like almost a lifetime between where we were, where I was a year ago, and where we are today. The woman I am today. And even more radical is to think of the one or two trips before that. How much can change in a cycle. How powerful these days can be, the rise and fall of the sun and moon day in and day out. The tides of life and love and where they can bring us to if we choose to be washed over by them like rocks on shore, our rough edges being smoothed over by the waves and sands of time. Surrendering to the slow pounding of salt, wind, and God.

I know it has been painful. Never would I have wished for the pain, heartache and despair I remember feeling a year ago today. I could not have imagined that heartbreak, that disappointment or betrayal. It felt like a lifetime of it all wrapped…


“To finally surrender ourselves to healing, we have to have three spaces opened up within us all at the same time: our opinionated head, our closed down heart, and our defensive and defended body. That is the core work of all spirituality - and it is work.” - Richard Rohr

A message from Clarissa Pinkola Estes

My friends, do not lose heart. We were made for these times. I have heard from so many recently who are deeply and properly bewildered. They are concerned about the state of affairs in our world now. Ours is a time of almost daily astonishment and often righteous rage over the latest degradations of what matters most to civilized, visionary people.

You are right in your assessments. The lustre and hubris some have aspired to while endorsing acts so heinous against children, elders, everyday people, the poor, the unguarded, the helpless, is breathtaking. Yet, I urge you, ask you, gentle you, to please not spend your spirit dry by bewailing these difficult times. Especially do not lose hope. Most particularly because, the fact is that we were made for these times. Yes. For years, we have been learning, practicing, been in training for and just waiting to meet on this exact plain of engagement.

I grew up on the Great Lakes and recognize a seaworthy vessel when I see one. Regarding awakene…

Coming apart & coming home.

It was about just about a year ago that I drove home in a panic after Ian said, “My world has just fallen apart. Come home.”

It is amazing what can happen in a year. How the world can change. Come apart at the seams and be stitched back together. Fall apart and be rebuilt completely, almost.

The truth is, I must have had a pretty good foundation already. The scaffolding pretty firmly in place. Cornerstone fixed, sturdy from years of preparation. Years of it coming – not him, me. Years preparing to come home to myself.

That coming apart is what I needed to come home. To take the final steps, in faith, back to the only home I have ever really needed – my own heart, where God lives.

I knew I needed to move out of fear and into love, but I had no idea what that really meant. That it meant an internal shift; the fashioning of an internal tapestry I am only now beginning to see more than one stitch at a time. Love. Faith. Compassion. Wholeness. The source: me and God. Real love, mature…